Freewrite: January 13, 2011

In my life, one of the most important things that has ever happened to me was becoming a foster family. I can't remember what it felt like when we first started (I was about 4 years old.), but I can remember what it felt like when we stopped. I know why we stopped, but I don't understand how we stopped. To me, it was really hard to realize that these kids wouldn't be coming in and out of our home anymore and that was devastating to me. I got to help take care of them and I felt like although it was probably best for our family, I was angry and wanted to keep doing as long as I could. Why did I feel like that? What made it so important to me? Why did it feel like my whole life just ended when we stopped taking in foster kids? Why is it still so important to me? Why do I feel this attachment to all kids- especially the younger ones that need help and someone to look up to in their lives? Was there some specific event in the 12 years we did foster care that made me feel like I was meant to do that for the rest of my life or was it just a culmination of everything in the past ten years? Why do I want to do foster care after I start my own family? Why do I feel such a strong pull to help these kids that I haven't had contact with in years? Was there a specific event that made my Mom realize that she couldn't do foster care anymore? Where are those kids now? Where is the not-so-little boy we wish we would have adopted? Why can't we adopt him now so that he will have a forever family like he should? Why do I have such a strong sense of family?

WORD COUNT: 320

Have I rubbed off on others?
Who has rubbed off on me?

TURNING POINTS IN MY LIFE: Cameron asking me out, my family deciding to become a foster family, my family deciding to stop being a foster family, adopting Jenna & Alex, becoming a high schooler, joining the HS marching band, becoming a part of student staff, becoming a sophomore, Cylee & Gabee being born, going to MSU for Ozarko and realizing that it felt like home and where I was meant to go for college, volunteering at BBBS

[Short] Freewrite: November 19, 2010

I only have a few minutes, but I just wanted to say that my cousin's baby, Gabee, who was born 7 or 8 weeks ago is now home! She came home a couple days ago. I haven't been over to see her yet, but she is almost 6 pounds! It's so exciting! I can't wait to go over and finally be able to hold her and take lots of pictures so that I can show everyone. I love you, Gabee Noelle, and you just have to keep getting stronger and bigger so you can come over on Sundays for our big family dinners. :)

WORD COUNT: 103

Freewrite: November 10, 2010

SLAM! The car door shuts, closing in the closest thing I'd ever had to a sister. I cannot remember a lot about that day, but I remember the feeling. As a foster family, my family had taken in many kids before, during, and after we had Jasmine. She had come to us when she was about two months old, meaning we had her for about a year and a half before she moved to live with her biological aunt in another state. We had many kids before that who had been there for at least that long and some even longer, so it should not have been a shock or super-emotional event when she left, but she was different. I had really bonded to her and really hoped she would be the one to stay with us. Several children had left our homes that had meant a lot to us, like Caleb (we had him for 3 years), Rebecca (we had her for 3 years also), and Bri (we had her for a couple years). When they left, it was emotional, but we more or less got over it. I guess I eventually got over Jasmine leaving, but it was the hardest departure that I had ever been a part of. However, the story gets better.

We got a call from Jasmine's biological aunt about a year later, something I didn't know about until a meeting a little while later. She had decided that Jasmine needed more extended family than she could give her, and wanted to know if we would like to take Jasmine back into our family so that she could be loved by more than just a few people. My parents considered this, and took into consideration our opinions also. They asked, "Would you like a little sister?" I said yes, thinking I would soon be getting a baby sister. I was wrong- we soon drove up to meet this family so that we could get Jasmine- aka Jenna- and bring her back home. We adopted her when she was four- she is now ten, almost eleven. She can be a little crazy at times, but I wouldn't trade her for anyone else.

WORD COUNT: 366